Regarding her Crumbtastic post.

Ok... lets start with the fact that the crumbs are from the toast I made to serve her in bed along with perfectly fried eggs and bacon. I was in a hurry to get it served hot. Did you tell everyone about the breakfast in bed? No. Only about the crumbs in the butter. And as to the question of how all the crumb laden margarine got gloped onto one side of the container... I dropped it.. okay? I dropped it while I was carrying it and your peach butter along with the egg carton. It hit the floor and I guess it all got flung to one side of the container... but don't worry the lid didn't come off and Lola and Jackie didn't lick at the contents until I retrieved it. I promise.

But on to an examination of my and my beloved Dream Girl's OCD quirks and other eccentricities...

Dream Girl:

• She says that food in a bowl should be served with a spoon and food served on a plate should be accompanied by a fork. The exception has been every single time I have provided her with the requested flatware. Without fail it has been wrong every single time. Evidently Dream Girl came up with the whole, "i" before "e" except after "c" sometimes, rule.
• According to Dream Girl, food and medicine should be disposed of at the precise moment it is "out of date". I swear I have heard her get out of bed, go to the kitchen and throw the milk out just after midnight.
• She will toss out an entire block of cheese because there is a little speck of mold on one corner.
• She washes her hands at least 10,000 times a day. She washes her hands BEFORE and after she pees. (And she pees a lot. She has a bladder about the size of an acorn.)
• She won't allow anything to rest on the dash of her car. (It casts a reflection in the windshield which might cause her to hit something.) This from the woman that ran over the hood of a car when she was driving my truck.
• She has certain hangers that are reserved for certain clothes. Some she says are for jeans because they are stronger. They are all plastic... What???... now she can measure the tinsel strength of plastic by looking at a hanger. And for God's sake no wire hangers allowed. Unless it is for my clothes. And even then, if I leave the wire hangers unattended she will toss them out.
• Okie Sister can't throw anything away. She doesn't call it hoarding though. She calls it saving it for the garage sale. I would post a picture of the garage again but she would get mad at me. She says that somehow I make it look worse that it really is...
• She gets the remote, period. Always. She can't sleep if the remote is on my side of the bed. I have held the bedroom TV remote so few times I don't even know how to use it.
• Dream Girl wants to get out and breathe the fresh air as long as she doesn't have to leave the house or be around people and as long as she can control the temperature.
• It takes her 12 minutes to do her hair and makeup. (I don't use makeup and I don't have hair so that's 12 minutes that I am standing around tapping my foot)

Me:

• Sandwiches should have the condiment spread equally and uniformly across the entire surface of the bread. I wish there were square tomatoes so the tomato would be even across the sandwich.
• My sandwiches must be cut in half diagonally.. for those of you riding the short bus that means top left corner to bottom right corner. No exceptions.
• I don't touch raw chicken or some vegetables... mostly lettuce.
• I hate detest clowns.
• I can't stand sock buggers. You know those balls of sock fuzz that end up inside the sock.
• I check that the back doors and windows are locked at least twice every night before going home.   
• I shake the front door of the shop as many as five times before I am positive that it is locked. I have driven back to the shop on more than one occasion to check the front door.
• I think about the same person when I mow a certain spot on my back yard (no they are not buried there), for absolutely no reason, but it happens every time without fail.
• The same thought runs through my mind when I am doing dishes, it is a fleeting thought and has no connection to the task at hand.
• The dogs must get exactly the same amount of chicken in their evening food bowl. I have even weighed each portion before.
• I can't throw anything away, but at least I don't use the guise of having a garage sale someday.  I prefer to call the stuff keepsakes.
• Jeffrey the Giraffe scares me.
• When I ate Skittles prior to my diabetes diagnosis I would first separate them into colors and then eat all of each color in ascending order from least to most favorite with orange being the least and purple being the most favorite.
• At night if I go into the bathroom I don't turn on the light because I'm afraid that there will be an evil looking Leprechaun standing on the toilet tank.

I guess we are both pretty jacked up because this is in no way a complete list. What a great couple we make. Some people name their house... if we did our house would be called Casa Psychosis.

If ever you see us at an event or function, please just marvel at all the things that had to come together in order to make that happen. And if Dream Girl won't shake your hand it's because she is holding the remote.